Many years ago, when I was struggling with some really big things in my life and career [divorce, being stalked by a co-worker, extreme burnout… to name a few], someone shared this phrase with me, and I was stopped in my tracks:  

Life happens for me, not to me.

What?!? There was a time in my life when I felt like everything was happening to me. Every setback and every challenge felt like an obstacle placed in my path to derail me from where I wanted to go. 

I would ask myself, “Why is this happening to me?” It was a mindset that kept me feeling stuck, powerless, and overwhelmed.

But then, with awareness, coaching, and tenacity, something shifted. Little by little, I began to realize that life wasn’t punishing me – it was teaching me. The challenges I faced weren’t obstacles; they were opportunities for growth. Hard ones for sure! 

This shift in perspective changed everything. Instead of asking, “Why is this happening to me?” I started asking, “What is this teaching me?” That’s when I began to see life as happening for me, not to me.

The Power of Perspective

When we believe that life is happening to us, we play the role of the victim. We feel powerless and reactive, as though we have no control over our circumstances. But when we embrace the belief that life is happening for us, we step into the role of the creator. We see every experience, even the difficult ones, as an opportunity to learn, grow, and evolve.

A Personal Shift

One of the most challenging periods in my life was when I faced a significant professional setback. A project I had poured my heart and soul into fell apart unexpectedly, and I was left feeling devastated. I remember sitting in my office, feeling like the rug had been pulled out from under me. The old me would have wallowed in self-pity, convinced that life was against me. But this time, I chose to look at it differently.

I asked myself, “What can I learn from this? How can this experience make me stronger, wiser, and more resilient?” And the answers came.

I realized that this setback was a lesson in patience, perseverance, and the importance of aligning my work with my true purpose. 

It was a nudge from the universe to reassess my priorities and to let go of what wasn’t serving me. That experience, as painful as it was, became a turning point in my life and career.

Tips for Embracing the ‘Life Happens for Me’ Mindset

1. Reframe Your Challenges
   • When faced with a difficult situation, ask yourself, “What is this teaching me?” Look for the lesson or the growth opportunity in every challenge. This simple shift in perspective can turn a negative experience into a powerful catalyst for change.
2. Practice Gratitude
   • Even in tough times, find something to be grateful for. Gratitude shifts your entire focus from what’s going wrong to what’s going right. It helps you see the silver lining and keeps you grounded in the belief that life is working in your favor.
3. Trust the Process
   • Understand that every experience is part of your journey. Even when things don’t go as planned, trust that there’s a reason for it. Life is unfolding exactly as it should, and every experience is shaping you into the person you’re meant to become.

Embracing the Journey

Life is a series of lessons, each one designed to help us grow and evolve. When we adopt the mindset that life is happening for us, we reclaim our power and become the creators of our own destiny. We stop seeing ourselves as victims of circumstance and start seeing ourselves as empowered beings, capable of turning every experience into a steppingstone toward our highest potential.

As you navigate your own journey, know that every challenge is an opportunity in disguise. Life is always working for you, even when it doesn’t feel like it. Take hold of the lessons, trust the process, and know that you are being guided toward your greatest good.

Sacred Leadership Call to Action:

I invite you to take a moment today to reflect on a recent challenge or opportunity. Ask yourself: How is this happening for me? What lesson, growth, or new direction is being offered? Let this reflection guide you as you continue to lead with grace, strength, and unwavering belief in your worth.

You are powerful. You are enough. And you are exactly where you need to be.

With love and empowerment,

Susan Elizabeth
xox

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